Happy Valentines Day friends! Hope it’s a happy one for all of you.
Today is a day with such loaded emotion in a lot of ways. I remember when I was a single lady, I absolutely hated this holiday. I felt left out, alone, and extra sad that I didn’t have someone to love and shower with gifts. It was depressing not to have a Hottie to put on a LBD and heels for so we could go order the couple’s special at The Melting Pot together. In my head, I constructed a perfect Valentine’s Day that I imagined most married couples experienced every February 14th.
I’ve had the most insane February so far, and it’s given me a new clarity about Valentine’s Day.
Our entire family has been battling the flu from hell for almost two weeks. I first got the flu symptoms on Tuesday February 5th, and between then and now I’ve been the most sick I’ve been in my entire adult life. There were days I could hardly get my head off my pillow. And then my husband got the flu, and then all three of our children fell prey to the beast. To be so weak you can hardly hold your baby without sitting down is kind of scary. To be up all night coughing up a lung because you’ve contracted bronchitis, but still have to be awake enough to feed and comfort you children the next morning, is a nightmare.
I feel like I’m coming out of a ten day drunken fog. Today is the first day I’ve gotten dressed in real clothes since February 5th – not lying.
With the type of profound sickness my family has just been through, there’s a special kind of mental clarity that comes through such weakness and suffering.
Single ladies: those of you longing for a man to love you, to shower you with treats and gifts and kisses on Valentine’s Day and every day. Listen closely because I have found a key to happiness in love and I want the same for each of you:
It’s not the man who showers you with presents, roses, chocolates and kisses that is going to steal your heart and melt it into a pool of adoration a thousand times a day.
Sure, those things are nice, but they aren’t what you really want for ever into eternity.
Instead, look for the man who will serve you to the point of laying down his very life for yours each and every day. In big ways and small ways. Find the man who’s love shows forth in the outpouring of all he’s got for the woman who is his all.
I guarantee, ladies, that in the grand scheme of life, you want the man who walks the halls at night with a teething baby because his wife is too weak to life her head off a pillow. You want a man who, instead of bringing you bon bons, drives around town to find the best comfort food takeout to bring home to a wife who’s completely lost her appetite. Find a man who loads his babies up in the car to take a long drive so his wife can take a nap in a quiet house.
These things seem very mundane, don’t they? But here’s the truth.
It’s in the giving and the loving in the every day little way things of this world that will form a strong knot of love that will not soon be undone.
Find the man who serves you, putting your needs above his own, and you’ll find a friend and lover who will adore you forever. He’s the one you want to say yes to – a million times over.
I find it funny that on the Feast of Saint Valentine our culture celebrates amorous love, when today we celebrate a martyr saint: a saint who if he taught us anything about love, taught us that the highest love is love as sacrifice. Sacrifice and suffering and offering for the One you love and Who first loved you.
P.S. I’m featured as a guest blogger for Spirit Catholic Radio Blog today, sharing a bit of the story of how Peter and I met. Head over and read about our first phone conversation…on Valentine’s Day 2008. :o)
PPS. Petey Weinert if you happen to read this today, I love you forever plus one and this song is what’s playing in my head about you today. I’m so very grateful God gave me you.
Cause God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
And for when I think I lost my way
There are no words here left to say, it’s true
God gave me you